Friday, June 25, 2010

When the universe sends you bad stories

I've settled on a new mantra for myself: if you open your heart to the universe, it will fill your soul with stories. I shared this mantra with the P-i-C on our nightly casing of joints and he liked it.

"But what do you do when the universe sends you a bad story?" he asked.
"No such thing. You might have a bad telling, but there's no such thing as a bad story. Stories just are."

Well apparently I was wrong. Today we found out the unthinkable news: some good friends of ours lost their first baby girl in childbirth. For all of our shock and devastation, there was no possible way for me to think of this story as anything other than bad. Every time I told someone new and felt that awful pit of grief, I knew this story wasn't some emotionless, blameless thing. And the P-i-C's question came echoing back to me.

What do you do when the universe sends you a bad story?

My thought: you make it a good one. Because sweet baby girl was a fighter. She fought to spend a few precious moments in her parents' arms, to say hello to the world and let them know they were loved, that she knew they loved her, and that even if the universe saw fit to take her out of it, she was going on her terms. She would have been a joy to watch grow up, but I didn't have to see her whole life to know what kind of person she was. She showed us in the twelve minutes she was here.

I won't look on what could have been, I'll look on what was and know we were blessed.


Anonymous said...

I'm so, so sorry for your friends and their family. That's heart-breaking.

Kathi Oram Peterson said...

How sad! I don't know if there is anything that would sooth the loss of a child. Though, I firmly believe that someday we'll all be reunited with our loved ones who have passed away.

Stina Lindenblatt said...

That was so hard to read. That's every pregnant mother's worst fear. Sorry that it's a reality for your friends. :(

Jennifer Shirk said...

Unbelievably sad. But a great way to turn a bad story around.
I'm so sorry for their loss.

laurel said...

It was encouraging to hear your spin on this tough tragedy. Friends at my church went though something tough like this--though they new ahead of time their child had inoperable genetic defects and would survive only minutes outside the womb. Our whole church community grew a lot as we suffered with them and comforted one another. Their daughter's short life made huge ripples in the universe.

I hope it not too insufferably rude to ask a very off topic favor. Could you to send me your e-mail address? You'd offered to read something for me. You can catch me at laurels(dot)leaves(at) gmail(dot)com. Thanks!!

Christina Lee said...

My first tears of the day! SO SO SORRY!