JEM: (stumbling around at 4 in the morning trying to get dressed to take her mother to eye surgery) Why would anyone wake up this early? These pants seem tiny...oh, these are underwear. Need shirt. Shirt! (puts on P-i-C's shirt and stumbles to car)
Mom: That woman looks like she's staring at me.
Mom: Do you think she knows me?
Woman: (to JEM) Did you go to Johns Hopkins?
JEM: (looks down at shirt, blushes) Uh, no, this is my husband's shirt.
Woman: Did your husband go to Johns Hopkins?
JEM: (more shameful blushing) Uh, no. I think he visited?
Woman: (look of disillusionment before turning away)
Mom: I guess she wasn't looking at me, then.
University education FAIL.